Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (410): View more from Maryland

  Btw the nut in my hair goes great with my outfit !!! :(

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (410): Btw the nut in my hair goes great with my outfit !!! :( http://tfl.nu/bf6a
  Replies (6) Good night (831) Bad night (1611)
• Favorite

  (603): View more from New Hampshire

  I plan on putting pajamas back on after I shower. Today is going to be awesome.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (603): I plan on putting pajamas back on after I shower. Today is going to be awesome. http://tfl.nu/ibqv
  Replies (16) Good night (5517) Bad night (1313)
• Favorite

  (952): View more from Minnesota

  I saw a sign that said worlds largest frying pan next exit. Way to do your fucking part Iowa.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (952): I saw a sign that said worlds largest frying pan next exit. Way to do your fucking part Iowa. http://tfl.nu/1yb9
  Replies (98) Good night (3717) Bad night (734)
• Favorite

  (218): View more from Minnesota

  The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (218): The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it? http://tfl.nu/eoc0
  Replies (3) Good night (2719) Bad night (616)
• Favorite

  (702): View more from Nevada

  I don't think I have ever puked up that much free breakfast in my life...thank god for Nickle Beers.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (702): I don't think I have ever puked up that much free breakfast in my life...thank god for Nickle Beers. http://tfl.nu/kck1
  Replies (6) Good night (2198) Bad night (1012)
• Favorite

  (519): View more from Ontario

  What part of i'm handcuffed to an oven do you not understand?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (519): What part of i'm handcuffed to an oven do you not understand? http://tfl.nu/srza
  Replies (10) Good night (5093) Bad night (1791)
• Favorite

  (859): View more from Kentucky

  the fact that he forgave me for making out with the bartender is proof that i can fuck my way out of anything.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (859): the fact that he forgave me for making out with the bartender is proof that i can fuck my way out of anything. http://tfl.nu/cxc9
  Replies (9) Good night (1906) Bad night (2124)
• Favorite

  (717): View more from Pennsylvania

  She made me go down the fire escape when her mom came for breakfast.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (717): She made me go down the fire escape when her mom came for breakfast. http://tfl.nu/4m88
  Replies (7) Good night (2631) Bad night (880)
• Favorite

  (717): View more from Pennsylvania

  Found her with a stray dog now called champagne, crying about how she feels a mom now. Had to take her home. The dog too.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (717): Found her with a stray dog now called champagne, crying about how she feels a mom now. Had to take her home. The dog too. http://tfl.nu/67rw
  Replies (1) Good night (907) Bad night (1255)
• Favorite

  (810): View more from Michigan

  I walked out of the bedroom naked holding a used condom only to be greeted by half of my family. Happy birthday mom

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (810): I walked out of the bedroom naked holding a used condom only to be greeted by half of my family. Happy birthday mom http://tfl.nu/cd2y
  Replies (7) Good night (1373) Bad night (2666)
• Favorite

  (970): View more from Colorado

  I'm imaging you naked, covered in butter. And I gotta say, I'm not impressed.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (970): I'm imaging you naked, covered in butter. And I gotta say, I'm not impressed. http://tfl.nu/hmgx
  Replies (10) Good night (533) Bad night (1483)
• Favorite

  (575): View more from New Mexico

  Of course I will... FYI I just gave my balls a crew cut.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (575): Of course I will... FYI I just gave my balls a crew cut. http://tfl.nu/7s27
  Replies (8) Good night (829) Bad night (492)
• Favorite

  (540): View more from Virginia

  We got Pizza Hut & Papa Johns, delivered within seconds of each other, and both delivery people did a shot. I was put on Earth for this moment.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (540): We got Pizza Hut & Papa Johns, delivered within seconds of each other, and both delivery people did a shot. I was put on Earth for this moment. http://tfl.nu/ze3a
  Replies (3) Good night (1557) Bad night (331)
• Favorite

  (286): View more from

  I feel like I deserve an award for facing my fear of penises in my face.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (286): I feel like I deserve an award for facing my fear of penises in my face. http://tfl.nu/gle0
  Replies (9) Good night (601) Bad night (231)
• Favorite

  (315): View more from New York

  she asked me to come back to her house where "hopefully her kids were asleep". that my friend is what i call a dealbreaker

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (315): she asked me to come back to her house where "hopefully her kids were asleep". that my friend is what i call a dealbreaker http://tfl.nu/ddqo
  Replies (3) Good night (263) Bad night (665)

Randomize