drunk waterpark is besst waterpark.
Text me when you wake up so I know you're ok. It's really worrisome to get home at this hour and find 3 men passed out in my room but no you. Love you, goodnight. :-)
I wouldn't have puked last night if I didn't inhale straight pepper from you shattering the pepper shaker on the wall.
I have a way to get him back. you're going to have to take one for the team and make a visit to the health department. you in?
in my defense, he kept drinking all of my water.
he had diabetes and you told him to stop being a pansy!
if I'm at school tomorrow just indulge my moment of pity and let me cry on your shoulder
Like really my mothers day gift is a pic of his dick
The cab driver just showed us a POV shot of himself getting ridden by a chick he took with his flip phone. Confirmed not taken in cab. Gonna be a good night...
Almost there.
define "almost". like I have enough time to watch a youtube video or oh shit, put on some goddamn pants because they're in the driveway.
some dude just accurately guessed my height and bra size.. that is cup AND inches around. creepy, yet impressive
watching spice world high feels so wrong yet so right
I think the reason she hasn't text me back is because I spanked her ass with Hulk Hands
I just felt emotion and I'm not okay with it
It's obvious you're hotter. You've been doing a married guy for almost 2 years.
I just put together something from IKEA so that’s mandatory oral for a week.
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