Dude my mom stole all your condoms
I would never have sex with Danny Devito!! JSYK.
Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
I just named my vagina "The Boneyard"
More like "Chia Pet"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
Reggie can tackle my bush.
Fail #1 I puked off the balcony onto the balcony below us and when I tried to pour water on it in the morning to wash it off it just went all over their deck. Sorry room 1342 but welcome to Jamaica
Hey, don't feel sorry for me, the two girls in front of me just ordered 18 dollars worth of taco bell. Life could be worse.
No, I am not setting up my roomba to clean up puke.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got kicked out of the bar for suggesting that the bartender drop her tits into my Redbull instead of the usual liquor
i ended up eating cold sauceless spaghetti out of the container in the fridge with my hands.
we're the same shoe size and he owns more pairs of heels than i do. this could be the beginning of a beautiful friendship
It's so weird fucking this kids aunt then going to the gym with him everyday, but my sick minded self loves it.
What part of the grouping of the words "anal beads" confuses you?
It wasn't my fault.
You let her suck your neck. Yes it was your fault.
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