like i told you yesterday: virgins, blood, my name. do it.
She is two pictures of justin bieber away from being blocked from my news feed
he sounded really stupid. it was like his puke had a stutter, too.
Im deleting that text because its a possible ncaa violation
Nothing like moscato in your sinuses tobmake your night complete
Then he kept saying sentences and ending them all with "the point of no return" even if it didn't make sense, and kept telling this other guy he wouldn't be his "wife son"
Get here, there are important joints to be smoked and pies to be eaten
You told her that she shouldn't be allowed to wear clothes then when her roommate asked if you like her you said "no I just want to insert things into her"
I stand by it.
Dad had me doing shots of chocolate mint Everclear last night. I've never felt closer to him.
Its official, if she bites your dick through your jeans, ya'll go together. A lesson you shouldn't have to learn after the fact.
I saw that you sent me a photo and the first thing out of my mouth was "I swear if it's another photo of a dick poking out of a bubble bath"
How much money would it take for the bouncer to get us beers while we wait in line to get in?
$450 apparently whoopwhoop
is it too soon to tell him I'm available anytime for Christmas themed pity sex and I'll even wear a Santa hat?
The UTI came back with a vengeance.
i just want a beer and a blow job. is that so much to ask?
and i just want a ring so i can stop faking it. is that?
Randomize
