i permit you to call me
Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
but his dog just died...ill send him an edible arrangement or a 6 pack or something
The best part about the NBA starting up is I get to see Charles Barkley make a fool out of himself for 8 months
2 bagels in my tummy and my herpes on my mind
She kept saying 'I love you' but i couldn't tell if she was talking to me or to her beer.
i'm surprised you didn't wake up. like i literally came when he was fingering me as i was spooning with you and all you did was mumble "that's a good idea, mom" and pull the sheets away from me.
This guy in a neck brace is ordering bottle service at the strip club. Not sure whether to applaud his commitment or scorn his addiction. It's a draw.
just saw someone in just a bathrobe not even tied shut run to the bathroom with a facefull of cum. Someone had a good night
Her fucking playlist had randy newman on it. It was like woody was watching the whole time.
I figure a girl that drinks as much as I do should always have pregnancy tests on hand
I just call them the hipster frat because they wear shirts other than pastel polos and listen to MGMT while playing dice.
All I remember is laying in that secret hideaway closet, naked, with a beer cowboy hat on and you walking in and sitting down crying because no one would have sex with you
Remember I am not doing blow tonight. I REPEATE NO COCAINE unless I do it with your mom
why yes, bad decisions will be made starting at 3PM Thurs through 8PM on Sun. You have been warned. Plan accordingly.
Randomize
