Dude, she DOES look like she'd give good head. No bottom jaw, I checked.
i dont know whats so great about being respectable.
OMG! Someone dumped chocolate soft-serve in the bathroom! Dibs!
It was like what a highfive between zeus and Jesus would sound like
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
the best thing about long term relationship is that the fact that i bothered to shave my legs today counts as a valentines gift
He said he has something to give me... I swear to God if it's a joint or a framed picture of his penis i'm going to kill him
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
Definitely just put my car on cruise control so I could stick my head out of the sunroof while driving to taco bell.
We found him sitting in a beach chair in the basement storage room passed out. Idk if we should move him or pass the bowl around.
It's my 3rd annual 21st birthday party. Disney themed. There will be blood.
Is it considered a bad morning to find your boss half naked in the parking lot of work at 7am?
That depends, how hot is your boss?
I put on pants and a bra for you and you never showed up. There is no forgiveness for that.
I think I pulled a muscle in my tongue.
sorry? thank you? I love you?
"Why is there a bottle of Tequila taped to the fan?"
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