oh, and bring over your fire extinguisher. we're gonna get the mailman again
I wish everyone walked around campus with a video of what they did this weekend above their heads.
I bought the love spell lotion from victoria secret so it atleast smells like a girl is present while I'm masturbating
mid blow job she looked up and said "we aren't even facebook friends!"
Drunk Tina signed up to be part of the crew team and got a text from the captain telling her there's practice tomorrow. Wtf
We shot off some fireworks at 12 and then I orchestrated the group singing of god bless the USA all while wearing a don't tread on me flag as a cape. I repped hard.
He just snapchatted me a picture of his cock. The angle makes it look like a freakin skyscraper. Thinking of photoshopping a little monkey on it.
I DON'T WANT TO KNOW THE SCIENTIFIC REASONING BEHIND WHY I STARTED A HAREM ESPECIALLY NOT FROM A GUY IN THE HAREM!
im dying and naked and this is what youre living with next year.
Is it weird that the cop that arrested me called me twice to tell me that I left my ring at the police station
You have no idea the kind of bodily contortions I had to do to access your neighbor's WIFI
Our sibling relationship has really blossomed into a wonderful mutual acceptance of sluttyness
We have to do it Saturday and get a thirty. If i remember correctly it takes me 12 beers to become a wizard
Will you remind me I changed my hotspot phone password to fuckyouprivilegedwhitedude
i'm the most scandalous girl at stop and shop. i kinda have to fuck him in the meat cooler.
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