you were passed out in your cheese fries by the time he brought out your second order of french toast.
Was this before, or after you took my brand new bag of shredded cheese, and "Made it rain"?
In all fairness I didnt see your dick because it was already in her
... Already stepped in vomit and got a dirty look from a fat in a neck brace
Cause your way of greeting people at the club was grabbing a tit and jiggling it while yelling a name, which usually wasn't theirs, and guys weren't safe either.
No more Raisinettes before sex. That's what happened. I just put it together
I sent him an 18 page sext. He's going to have a good morning.
he may or may not have motorboated me on the steps of the library of congress
No one wanted to hang out so vodka and I are hanging out
I'm just drunk enough to be eating egg rolls on the toilet
so... i have a picture of you and three other girls making kissy faces at this giant stuffed banana you're holding. however, you seem to be violently screaming at it.
Those bitches did NOT have my back.
Can we be gay Bert and Ernie for Halloween?
The Lion King Is on YouTube
Until 2 minutes ago I actually had a chance to pass my midterms... thanks alot
You asked him if he would have sex with you under the dinosaur. He declined and then you started crying, blaming the sand.
I’m inviting a few of my favorite manwhores to a pool party. Bring booze and wear your banana hammock so Amy can see what I’m always talking about
Randomize
