I just saw him at the bookstore and all I could think about was him licking your ass
I have fb friend requests from two random swedish brothers... Must have something to do with that hostel I stumbled into on mardi gras
Sarah Palin is going to have a show on the discovery channel...Can I get a moment of silence for knowledge?
the arrest was probably divine intervention, cause i think we were heading to an ill-advised threesome.
He couldn't stand on his own, but he managed to somehow to get to the beer garden and get served 3 more. I'm proud to call him my cousin.
One of those days. Also, your pants are now in my protective custody.
I mean, he's 40, foreign, artsy but with substance abuse problems and estranged children. How is he not my type?
Did you ever think you lost your bong and then you find it in the weirdest place? I mean, who leaves their bong in the shower?
He said we had an hour long conversation about how awesome I was.
the last thing is remember is that strange guy in the leotard...i woke up in my bed, naked, with a half eaten grilled cheese on my nightstand, a six pack in the fridge, a new pack of cigarettes on my pillow and coke in my purse. apparently i bought some drugs, shopped and cooked. typical.
Like Napoleon Dynamite?
Exactly like Napoleon Dynamite
But with bacon.
Apparently I was carrying around a bottle of listerine calling it 5 loco
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
I mean his penis was perfect in pictures but its even more perfect inside me
Speaking of dumpster fires, your ex tried to add me on Facebook
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