You just left with that feminine looking guy you kept calling "Jessica." Just giving the heads up.
my grandpa was trying to put butter into the pepsi and i'm like "grandpa what are you doing" and he looks down and goes "well i guess that wouldn't taste good anyway"
ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
He was sitting on the bathroom floor, swirling his finger in the toilet singing the Laguna Beach theme song. I don't know whether to laugh or help him.
We had to go visit his dealer in the hospital to buy some weed.
Found out last night that "Everclear" is Spanish for "shit got weird"...
If you think for one second that I would forget Mardi Gras, you clearly don't know how much I love boobs.
Wesley I'm sober and my body hurts. There wasn't much trust in any of those falls.
I haven't filled him in on Operation "find a sugar daddy & suck dick for money" yet, but I'm sure he just wants me to be happy.
Just saw a man in a motorized chair roll by drinking a beer. It's 9:45 AM. I love Louisiana.
dude I don't even care if I'm getting catfished the point is I'm going to get laid. hot bitch, fat bitch, skanky bitch, i don't care my penis is having an adventure tonight regardless
I appreciate alcohol much more now that I have to be sober sometimes
Using the money underagers give me to buy this semesters books.. My mom would be so proud
You had sex with a guy who has a purple beard last night. No Molly for a while, ok?
When I type "sleep" my phone suggests "with Trevor". My phones an asshole.
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