Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
My doc was like ur only supposed to have 6 sexual partners..thats just one semester at college
He had a huge mole on his dick. Genetics has cockblocked him for life.
I'm laying outside on my patio attempting to get sun with a puke bucket next to me... This is dedication to the tan my friend
My goal for tonight is to swipe my debit card through those weird rolls on the back of a big bald guy's head.
I'm venturing to your corner of this sin house in t minus 2 minutes.
I miss you more than I would miss junk food if I went on a diet. And you've seen me eat, you know how desperate I'd be.
I got us chalkboard mugs. Now whoever comes home with us can feel comfortable in the morning! I am too considerate to my one-night stands...
I want to get business cards and hand them to hot guys and say " hey if you ever want to like makeout and pretend it never happened call me"
Lets trade lives
And i will lay in bed and piss all over everywhere, drink whiskey and have sex with married bears
who's idea was it to start the NCAA tournament less than a week after St. Patrick's day? My liver needs time to recover for things like this.
just passed the gas station where we took pregnancy tests. memories.
Of course the sales lady was judging you, you bought a pregnancy test, ky jelly, diet pills and a 6 pack of red bull. Even i'm judging you.
I can't wait to see you & have espresso-fueled sex
Did you make it home alright?
No I'm sitting under a tree by a cricket. He's alone crying out for someone to Fuck him. This guy gets me.
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