i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
We are like the golden girls with less cheesecake and more drugs.
currently walking past a fire hyrdrant with a hose already attatched.. this could be dangerous..
You don't even understand how penises react in the cold. I'm like a 8 year old boy right now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He just laughed at his drink laid on the floor and crawled to the bathroom
They got their marriage license when they were at the courthouse for her arraignment.
I'm laying here in fetal position. I feel like a traffic cone
This is a mass text. Surprise drug testing at work today. Either I've finally got to fuck my boss or I've got to quit to make this all go away. Please respond with option a or b.
Listen, don't freak out when you walk out on me masturbating in front of my roommate. No homo. He just needs to be put to his place.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was packing a bowl naked and her dog just stared at me with pure rage
If I die write a nice eulogy and bury me with my star wars bobbleheads
i had to win in rock paper scissors, get called a fat whore, and make two dudes get in a fight so we could call next game on the table and you make zero cups. thanks asshole.
It started off with wine and ended up with me in only my pearls and heels. It was about the classiest sexual experience I've ever had.
It's been three years since Kelly shit in the to go box that we put in Sam's mailbox after we broke up. Considering Sam and I are friends again, should I finally tell him?
Those brownies did us in. I honestly blacked out completely.
What brownies? Ohmygod.
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