So we've decided on 'hamburger' as your code for tonight. If you add ketchup or fries, we know the threat level has escalated.
So i've def seen the girl running for student body VP getting fingered in a bar.
hahaha lucky. I'm fishing with some dude I just met when I woke up next to the mohawk river
Nobody knows who the hobo or dude who whipped out his balls is
Is it cheating if its a threesome? This is more like a party game than infidelity.
He said he only likes girls with a sense of humor, after he took his pants off I understood why
In my defense, last night's hookup turned out to be my actual girlfriend. That's gotta count for something, right?
We're all just looking at each other quietly, hoping that no one brings up last nights shenanigans.
I call him Seabiscuit because he's my trusty steed
Kinda awkward to hear your aunt complain about loose women when you're in town to be a stunt dick for a swingers convention. Just sayin.
She showed up after 3 hours and proceded to make us all feel like resonable human beings. I dont know how she did it but she did it.
My one night stand just messaged me and said he is praying for me...
He literally said from now on he's always banging chicks with asthma becuas it's such an ego booster
We went from him going down on me to swapping baby pictures of our moms.
THERE IS WATER LITERALLY DRIPPING OFF OF THE CHANDELIER. I OFFICIALLY HAVE THE WORLD'S WORST RAINFALL SHOWER HEAD.
Randomize
