can you take me to a tanning bed
sure, why though?
i have to go once so i can blame these herpes on the tanning bed and she won't get suspicious
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
Had to use the product locator on on the four loko website to find them at home. Got to go in the backroom of a grocery store to get them. Dedication.
we walked in to her beating him with a broom while he was trying to sweep ramen into a box. there were packing peanuts everywhere.
On second thought, trying to signify she was a butter face by wiping my bagel on her cheek may not have been in my best of interests
My econ prof just gave me a shot glass because I was the "randomly picked" winner of the lecture. Ties into our supply and demand lecture, supplied with a shot glass, demand a thirsty thursday
im sorry for trying to flush a roll of toilet paper down with my puke. probably not great for your toilet
Nothing like buying a handle and a 36 pack with a baby strapped on.
I cunt my lip shaving. That's not a typo, it's a placement clue
Good morning! So would you prefer me to show up kind of late or on time but looking like I got chewed up and spat out by an episode of Buffy the Vampire Slayer?
i came outside and he was eating her out on my lawn. i refuse to pick up the dog shit in my yard so i hope he chose the spot wisely
So that guy from plenty of fish has a lightning bolt tattooed on his face. I kinda feel like I HAVE to sleep with him now.
Update: He still has devil magic genitals.
You some how ended up sleeping on one of the beams that run along the ceiling of your house
thanks for the bj man. also make sure you close the gate behind you. the chickens are out.
Randomize
