i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
Convinced the domino's pizza delivery person to go to shaws and buy me a bottle of wild turkey. For america.
As girls, Bert & Ernie are not very bangable costumes. At least not by who we'd want to get banged by.
I was kidding. But I promise you I'd still find us the most eligible bangables, even if we dressed up like a dumpster and a prom night baby.
Just induced vomiting to put out a carpet fire.
Everyone is cheering
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It looked like his dick was wearing an argyle sweater.
If we can put a man on the moon, I'm sure we can turn a pringles can into a bong.
Literally just saw a 7 year old intently rub his penis on the metro. I'm not ready for this
And thanks to you I'm pretty sure I'm banned from every qdoba in south carolina. And cab company
I don't know what part of my sober brain thought it was a good idea to get stoned when I can barely walk with crutches as it is, but that part is stupid.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She has that type of face she reminds me of that weird girl from napoleon dynamite only taller and with hoop earrings.
He got in a fight. Then called me drunk to see if he should bail his friends out, or walk through a Taco Bell drive-thru. True love.
I let him use my phone and now I keep getting gay cruise ads, I guess he forgot to mention something.
like, there should be nothing wrong with me wanting to watch you put on a bikini and roll around in a kiddie pool of jello
She just. Cock slapped me. With string cheese.
Dude you where on that lil kids bike at 2 am ridin down the turning lane wearing only socks and a helmet singing born to be wild, no you weren't that fucked up
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