Do you think they could tell I was high on that conf call?
she was seriously choking and the whole time all he kept saying was "that's what she said"
Is it bad that I stopped wanting to fuck her as soon as I noticed she had dry skin?
I sometimes completely doubt that you're straight.
He had a beer bottle in each of his back pockets and was on rollerblades. All I remember is following him for about 10 minutes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We still need to grow old, buy a house, and drink 40's while wearing old people sunglasses, staring at the young studs mowing our lawn.
Coming to you live from the floor of my office..
Discovered that a nalgene holds an entire bottle of wine. Going mobile. Come find me.
Two questions. One. Where are you watching election results tomorrow? Two. Can we have Obama victory sex?
btw telling the cab driver, that took you to your booty call that is now returning your wallet that you left in his cab, that you want to hug him is awkward
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like weed makes my smarter. I'm watching the stocks and the way I understand if, do not invest in Yahoo right now because they are not fit for that.
I'm no longer puke free since 2013 am I.
Facebook: “Hey you fucked on a diving board, you should probably should wish him a happy birthday”
I WAS SURROUNDED BY HAIRY BALLS ALL ALONE.
He's gonna turn my vagina into the Sahara desert
You ran full speed into the glass door with your Patron and yelled "FEEL THE RHYTHM, FEEL THE RHYME"
Randomize