brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
I wish that guy wasn't missing teeth
You made eat vitamins until I threw up
Im about to have a threesome, Ill pay you twenty bucks to go clean my room. Just throw it all in the closet.
well I think it'll pretty much be gone by Saturday. On a scale of 1- Snooki's unborn child how much do periods freak you out?
He drank his beer out of his own shoe. Its his "party trick"
Was it you who made out with a toothless guy last night?
I plan on drinking enough to kill at least 2 frat boys and make an aa meeting weep for joy
Lets get coked out and steal a parrot this summer
I'm eating tortillas right now. Like not cooked tortillas. Someone is playing the guitar. Man with bandana.
Moral of the story: I had sex to Back to the Future last night.
But don't thank me for faking being asleep, if I was the real wing man, I would have left the bed
carb up bitch. we're drinking with football players.
I think I puked in the middle of sex last night if that's any indication as to how drunk I was.
Walked off the dance floor to find Gabe hitting on a dad bod at the bar. It was my Dad. Awkward is an understatement.
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