I just tried to pick my 105-lb puppy up and accidentally fingered its asshole
There are some things we keep to ourselves Brian
i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
From the crime scene it appears that I attempted to throw up into a candle.
Im already sauced. Have been for hours. Its kinda my thing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just because he saw my boobs doesn't mean he knows me all of a sudden
Hes still mad that I left the room mid-hookup to go get a pickle from the fridge.
we need to drink more beer. the fridge wont close.
Tim john just told us the story about him losing his virginity at 14 during church on the emergency exit staircase. This is day drinking?
Update. He just picked me up and tried to demonstrate
You leave me no choice. Your vagina is grounded. It can just sit there and think about what it's done.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Talked to Nate, told him he was a douche. Will give details when sober. It's ok. You're my best friend together a wolf pack. Olive juice.
Was that you I seen riding on the top of a cab? Way to start the new year
I mean you would really have to try to not have fun at a party that doesn't require pants....
I was 100% done.. I used my vibrator while eating cold pizza. Shit was magical.
All our friends are getting married, and I'm the dateless guy bringing molly to their weddings.
You yelled at me about a fork.
You probably deserved it, I'm very territorial about my cutlery.
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