god please explain to me why there's blood underneath my fingernails AND toenails?!?!
Dude To be completely honest I don't think you want me to.
Last night I got a napkin with 4 names & numbers: Katie, Ellen, Kylie...and Brandon.
just spent the last 4 hours searching ex-girlfriend porn to make sure there are no photos of me
just gave another girl i passed on the walk of shame a high five
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
COME GET ME FR THE HOSPIGAL'!!!!!
I accidentally lit my hair on fire and we broke the bed. How was your night?
I just commented on the education level of his penis.
I wish you were awake and high the same times I was awake and high. And also in the same state. So we can fuck passionately.
I would like to dedicate my cray behavior this week to my uncontrollable hormones and wine. Both have totally Efff'ed with my life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Getting haircut. The stylist asked about the body paint dried in my hair. I told her there was prob glitter, too. It was a fun night!
the people next to us at the red light cheered for you while you puked out the window...
"He didn't answer my snap so I know he's arrested"
Stupid adulating
Yeah it sucks, but at least I can buy wine so it all comes out in the wash
Goal: finish my bio assignment before the Xanax kicks in.
No reason. My tongue went numb after one shot. I may die tonight
Randomize