no, its his 'welcome back from rehab' party.
laying in bed listening to christian music, jealous of the hope they have for their life. also need to beat off, can i think about you?
you think the cum will come out of moms black shirt?
I found a horn on the street but it's okay I disinfected it with vodka
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just got a blowjob on the pier where my great-grandfather entered America.
First day of class and I'm in a bar drinking pitcher #3. Foreshadowing?
Sober me is really good at getting to the airport on time. Drunk me is really good at shitting my pants. Do you know how much pants cost at the airport????
I accidentally lit my hair on fire and we broke the bed. How was your night?
i think smoking weed in a ladies bathroom on the beach with two dudes might be the shadiest thing ive done in a while
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Your shoe was in the washing machine. I have it in my pocket. My phone rang before and I answered your shoe. Meet me at the bar in 10.
Well she started to strip and when she slung her hair at me, she painted my face with sweat. A LOT OF SWEAT. It was a weird boner.
yeah, never be friends with someone with shitty eyebrows.. they obviously already make poor life choices
alcohol and riverdancing are a dangerous mix. have a spraind ankle. i die now
It's five in the morning. wtf?
woke up to my little sister's best-friend's boyfriend in my bed, but how's your saturday going?
Now, I know I say this a lot, but you've obviously never seen my penis.
Randomize