He muttered something about having just washed he sheets, then demanded I give him all my quarters.
Can someone please explain to me why I woke up looking like Ziggy Stardust
16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
You hooked up with a kindergarten teacher?
Yea. It's kind of weird knowing that there are kindergarten teachers out there with their nipples pierced.
Yeah, my mom walked in on us. Instead of yelling, she went and hid in the bathroom til we finished. It was pretty classy.
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
I made an oral joke and he laughed... That's when I realized I wasn't Daddy's Little Girl anymore.
No, that was the night I was sneezing out barf
I get that he's ugly and I deserve better but I will still beat up the girls he hangs out with.
it was her dad's 50th birthday kegger. Within the first 5 minutes I got punched in the ear from an off-duty cop and smoked a joint the size of my vibrator.
oh yeah, and she got boxed-out by said cop. Then her dad turned around and high-fived him for it
You're going to be mad because I got baked, but not that mad because I'm bringing home kfc.
And remember people can't hear you kick ass in space
I'm recovering from the blowjob...She's doing her taxes...
He listens to me complain and in return I send him naked pictures. It's a win win situation
i puked in a jesus candle last night and then denied it... i'd say it was a pretty alright night
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