so it turns out you can rearrange the letters in "scottsdale" to spell "milf city." who knew?
Im already sauced. Have been for hours. Its kinda my thing.
she read insantiy as in-nast-tit-ty and asked what the hell does that mean...
At what number of girls whose last names are stored in your phone book as drinking establishments does it become excessive?
sometimes i think my sole purpose in life is to cockblock my roommate
You're doing that 'overestimating how much I care' thing again.
We're discussing which museums we should go to when we shroom. How ill would Picasso be?
Dude found out there's an open bar at the celebration of life thing for my grandma which is at noon. Now I know why I can drink so much
WHY IS HE GONE WHEN I ACTUALLY HAVE THE AMOUT OF ESTROGEN TO HUMP A SQUIRREL?!?!
Well he walked in last night, yelled at me for not playing any music and started dancing.
In the pie chart of my life, she is a huge part of why I drink.
Why did you load my phone up with pics of Al Gore?
He was hammered and shot his pistol into the lawn. Next thing I know sheriffs are at our house with M4s. He likes to party
All I want is to get as high as I did that time I started hallucinating that my brother was becoming a monkey and I saw my mum on every surface of your room.
how much of this shit do i need to take before i think its a good idea to set the house on fire and scream satanic mantras?
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