Did you draw a mustache on my drivers license picture??
He just refered to Steak and Shake as "a good place for couples". I will definitely not be shacking tonight.
the date was going great.. until he pulled down his pants and asked if there was any hair in between his cheeks.
Make puking fun. Chug half a monster right before you blow. Throw up foam. Most unique experience ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
KETAMINE SUNDAYS ARE SERIOUSLY FUCKING ME UP!
I asked her if she could eat some Doritos so when we made out it would taste awesome
Her mom came in and passed out drunk on the floor next to us while she was riding me, "it's all good, she does this all the time" is what she said
Wow two curved penises in one weekend. I feel like this may be good luck. Like finding a four leaf clover
You're telling that to the kid drinking Jack in nothing but a graduation cap
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When a guy asks for your ig but you already know his blood type, social security number, & mother's maiden name.
What happened last night? I'm too scared to get out of bed and see the destruction.
First of all, check to see if that naked guy is still alive. He didn't look to be breathing when I left
Should I be concerned that he called me mom when I got in bed on top of him?
Verdict: uncircumcised.
So I fell alseep while I was motorboating that girl last night infront of the entire party.
only 4 hours until nug lovin time
excuse me?
nug lovin. lovin nugs.
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