in vegas stuck in the middle of a pride right now
Pride?
thats a pack of cougars
go fuck yourself
Currently listening to 'Just Put it in Your Mouth.' remember when i went through that phase?
I like complaining with weaving words and complex sentences. It makes me seem more sophisticated and less bitchy.
if only i could text you this smell
know what turns me on? long, stringy hair on a pasty looking girl with an overstuffed backpack and kneepads over her jeans in case she falls off her scooter
your less of a man for seeing that
Can you really blame Steve Phillips? He went to Michigan. Plowing fat girls is a 100-level course there.
They're all gay and their wifi network is named HOMOS. I want to live with these people.
i dont care if i had to wear a dress to fuck her, she was super hot and i stand by my decision
I'm gonna sleep with her just to prove to my roomate that shes a slut and he's wasting his time
I was short on money so I let my roommate mase me for $60
When and where the fuck did we get a beach ball??
In other news, last night I told somebody they made eczema look so good they should call it sexzema.
I was blacked out when we met, so basically this will be a blind date.
It was the highest I'd ever been. I felt like a blob. A blob eating a burrito.
just yelled CURVEBALL at my nightie because it turned out to be a pair of shorts
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