He shit in the bushes next to the pool at the Venetian, after throwing up in the hallway. You really can do anything in Vegas.
The only reason anyone found out he threw up is because everyone heard it sizzle the bonfire out.
Its name is Richard. And I think he formally introduced us.
Security said no more parties of this kind. To me that translates to Theme party this weekend.
I'm going to replace you with a friend who will be happy when I find a huge penis
is it cool if i crash at ur house this weekend again bro
yea dude but i wld bring a sleeping bag or something just in case. or u may just have to shack up with a woman or 2 cuz we hav 10 girls visiting/staying over at my house.
how did u manage to make sleeping with a bunch of girls sound like an inconvenience?
Pretty sure I'm about to get another tattoo. It'll have mom in there somewhere for Mother's Day.
Happy you have kids and I don't day!
He went to 7/11 first and came back with condoms and a banana "in case we get hungry"
He stopped mid sex to pour wine in my mouth...
Marry him.
No no this isn't that fun. I'm alone drinking wine and me and the dogs ran out of things to talk about around 9 am.
Broken leg sex is fun because I just get to lay there
Do it!! We better have a duck by the time I get home.
That wasn't even sex. That was a fuckoning
...did you just create a word for what we did?
I just took a picture of Austin's dick wearing a hat. Except its not a hat it's a DayQuil cap.
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