the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
I lost of the blow last night. Found it later in my bag labeled Fairy Dust.
I just made $100 from people paying me not to get naked at the party... I need those P90X dvds
they started a semi-successful rumor that toby keith died. who says fraternities don't have goals
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At least a dozen asian tourists will be showing their friends pictures of me peeing off of Hoover Dam with a cop pointing his gun at me when they get home. I worry about the impact on their children.
it was the drunk execution of a sober decision, and its much more tasteful than the first mullet
You don't have to believe me. My vagina knows it happened.
I recommend you throw your keys as far as you can in one direction, your phone as far as you can in the opposite direction, and hold on.
so I am that guy with the red solo cup in class. someone has to step it up.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I want to be stormed in. I want to be stuck there. I want to climb a pyramid of strippers to safety
After closing we did it on every flat surface in the bar. Best use a coaster if you're coming to happy hour today.
Lmfao a voicemail screaming about you partying with your tits out and a text at 3 am saying you went too crazy... this should be a good one
I haven't been single on my birthday for 7 years. If you don't get me laid tonight, your best friend/wing woman status will be revoked.
Something like, "Merry Christmas. I hope Santa shits in your mouth."?
this is the second night in a row i've fucked a guy i met on craigslist. and it wasn't even a post for sex. i posted a housing ad. A HOUSING AD
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