he wouldn't shut up and let me sleep
yeah i got into a fight with my man last night
why can't men just shut up and put out?
i just found five singles in my underwear?! im suspicious but delighted none the less
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
Want to get naked in Baltimore this weekend?
I really think that guy just walks around with tennis balls in his pocket. No dick is that big
If I drank a glass of water for every drink I had I'd die of water intoxication like some tweaked out looser at a rave
Sorry I disappeared. Do you hate me?
Not at all, did you not hear me clapping outside your car on our way out?
Well my summer started by me waking up in a tube on the side of the pond this morning with 2 of my friends. So that's good..
I mean your new thing is losing body parts and feeling colors so its not like we are hurting for entertainment
you were caressing the jar of pickles then you looked down and whispered to them "I want you inside me"
Something about the fact that I could do coke off her ass cheeks just speaks to me
What a better way to celebrate that I'm single by becoming a stripper and making $1000 in one night
How I know I would be an awful mother....I just stirred the bong up with a baby fork. A literal baby fork....
I think it may be easier if I stay drunk/high til the wedding. You game?
It occurred to me today, whilst I was on the phone to boyfriend number 1, whilst in the car with boyfriend number 2 who was dropping me at the shops to meet boyfriend number 3 to help me buy a present for boyfriend number 4 that I should be having much more sex than I am.
Randomize
