Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
I left the party when things started to get crazy... and when I say crazy I mean: there was puke on the carpet, Evan was passed out behind a plant, Mary was making out with her ex while her present bf was making out with Nancy. Not to mention that someone fisted the wall. Also - someone is sleeping on your lawn - they might be dead, I didn't check. Later.
He started yelling "we're making a baby" mid thrust.. probably not the right guy for me right?
Well, according to foursquare I checked in "@under the bushes" at 3:27am. This could explain some things.
Just checked my recent transactions online. Between the hours of 1 and 3am on September 30th, I went to 7/11 4 times. Unacceptable.
I don't think he understands the importance of corndogs. Or condoms for that matter.
Dude walks in wearing jean shorts and a graphic tshirt and goes home with an attractive female. EXPLAIN YOURSELF UNIVERSE.
If one of us has to be polite I guess I won't sneak out while he's in the shower
I woke up in a stranger's bed wearing nothing but santa socks.
Can I come by? I want you to meet my squirrel
I think everyone, including the amish, know who you are after this weekend.
So how do you explain to your boss that Siri called him mid sex?
I someohow managed to lose my butt plug in tne midst of moving to B.C. and I am not a happy camper.
so on a scale from morning glass of wine to that time i burnt the garage down how drunk were you last night
About 'lets tie a boat to a truck and ride it down the freeway'
I know you think you’re ready to graduate but just keep these things in mind: taxes, I get up at 5 AM every morning, I have to buy vegetables when I go grocery shopping, and I can’t wear sweat pants to work. Take that victory lap and enjoy the sweat pants and bar hopping because it goes downhill real quick.
Randomize
