I just woke up and realized I puked in my boxers WTF.
You stay classy.
The worst part was I forgot until I tried to put them on.
Remember when we were trying to guess how many people could fit in my shower? The answer is 7
you made me watch la bamba, and then you yelled at me for disrespecting your mexican heritage.
She compared sex to doing dishes."You scrub them until they're wet."
I just asked the dr if it was herpes while wearing my shirt from the strip club...
I told you to stay away from the strippers in Oklahoma
I'don't know who your are but its that time a day. Drunk it up. Did you buy a House for goundhogs days?
This is going to be a 3 day beach sex fest. Do you understand
We will have to go big on the 4th! Nothing says independence like the impending doom of an ankle monitor
don't worry i just saved a song to my personal usb drive to give to the dj at the bar. he's playing old school jlo whether he likes it or not.
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
We can do this. We've been drunk at a gay bar, we will not be taken down by a Tuesday.
I wish I saved his nudes so I could anonymously submit them to his tumblr
Oh? I just remember dropping coins and trying to give the manager change to let me back into the bar.
I'm fucked-out. That state of being high between fucked up and passed out.
In celebration of finishing my homework, lets drink tea w/ vodka
Randomize
