NEED BACKUP we are in the kitchen arguing about who would win in fight against lil Wayne and snoop dog
he is not the type of person you only have sex with once. god adds years to your life every time you sleep with him.
I'm convinced that Kathy Griffin and Andy Dick are the same person...
The bubbles in my bathtub are singing to me in german....
Well his aunt was in the next room so we had to be quiet. I felt like i was on an episode of silent library.
This is the time you want your cat to have telepathy with you. To know if the guy downstairs left.
coming from the girl bound and determined to pee in the snow
why would you restrict a girl of that
Security said no more parties of this kind. To me that translates to Theme party this weekend.
Just found out my 21st birthday is on a Wednesday. The possibilities are cheap, as well as endless.
I'm going to a foam party and gonna grind someones dick off hayy
I just picked up a hitchhiker so karma will be on our side this weekend. Hahahahahaha
No.
I was just hotboxing under my sheets and I got lost on the way out.
It was so scary.
My loniness meter has reached its peak. I just played shadow puppets using my Big Mac on the wall with my cats
Paycheck hits in 37 minutes and I literally just emptied my handle of Tito's. If that isn't budgeting like a fucking adult, I don't know what is.
If Dr Phil has taught me anything about myself, it’s that I can seriously relate to those women who fake their pregnancies.
Randomize