I'm trying to decide if I want to bring home my 'beer champion' trophy or my chem books.
after watching ten minutes of "the decision," I conclude that King Lebron has more influence on America than Barak Obama. I love our countries values.
Who would have guessed that on my moms birthday she'd have sex with the door open. :(
this is not the time for floating mt dew and shots of tequila.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
nah we got kicked outta the bar after the bouncer saw us putting straws up Chelsea's nose to make her look like a walrus after she fell asleep at the table
And some old guy told me Jesus loves me and I laughed super hard and told him sinning is fun. Hahaha
Its everclear night, yall need carbs in your body!
Sooo Zach and Judd are on my porch drunk eating leaves and flowers...
dude, i just accidentally flashed your mom. BIG TIME.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've started budgeting for next year. It looks like I'll be crying tears of dollar bills and handing them over to pay back my unholy college debt.
please tell dad to clear the porn off his tablet before he lends it to anyone from now on
I don't remember what you did, but I DO remember that i'm supposed to hate you for it.
woke up and you werent here...its ok if we're never going to speak again but my furry hand cuffs are missing and i would like them back. thanks.
I'm still drunk, my mom is throwing up, and there is a random Irish guy out getting our house breakfast right now. Wednesday's are my bitch.
I'd rather explain to the cops why I'm naked than why I'm drunk.
Randomize