Too late, the blunt's already in my cleavage
Breaking personal boundaries is my trademark
its like what part of i just threw up mcdonalds breakfast means i want to make out with you?
She's drinking vodka out of a windex bottle. She is spraying it in her mouth and at strangers.
High enough to ask the woman at best buy if she ever feels like she's swimming. and telling the man outside that he smells like happy juice.
We had a pillow fight. It looks like an angel exploded here. A DRUNK ALCOHOLIC ANGEL
Apparently I made a stripper cry last night when I paid her $10 to go away
Also, in the middle of me riding him, he said "I want you to dance on my dick" like I was supposed to know what that means
At least he finally released me from his spooning oven of death...
Oh my god and he smells like heaven wrapped in a beard of knowledge
my star wars tattoo got me laid last night. definitely a dark side sort of benefit im thinking
He asked me if I wanted to blow his whistle and proceeded to pull out an actual whistle.
should i save it for someone special or be a feminist and be like "my vagina doesnt define me"
Noo not in a booty call way, in a 'How are your abs and penis doing today?' sort of way.
Nah leave him alone, he is at the strip club with his mom.
Randomize
