Well I'm going to a gay club in my banana suit. You should come. My bro is going as a pirate. I don't know if there's a theme.
Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
Drinking in an igloo changes everything.
If i die in the snow, get to my laptop and delete all of the nickelback. password is "barry"
as in "white"?
i wish the dell website had a "did you drink an entire bottle of rum and stepped on your laptop which shattered the screen this weekend and would like to know how to fix it without your parents finding out FAST?" link on their homepage.. i can't be the only one
They showed a guy on tv in a Brady jersey and a sweatpants boner when the NE offense took the field. They didn't show his face. I hope that wasn't you.
he broke off your car antennae to use as a walking stick before he smoked because he claimed to lack the facial strength needed to open his eyes when he's high
I just remember being in the bathroom alone cussing out the bunny
I just sang country roads at the top of my lungs with my cab driver. Tonight was a success.
I'm in a dress, surrounded by Republicans, and the bartender just told me he's "out of Jack Daniels" in a very accusatory tone. Shit, is it only 8 PM?
My mom just found my nipple clamps...... oh God why....
You're gonna be proud in the future that you fucked the next bill gates
Would jacking off with Benadryl cream be good or bad for the poison oak on my dick?
My hands are stained pink. I look like I fisted a muppet.
All he gave me was a sore vagina and film suggestions
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