look no pants
physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
So my prents justed posted "DO NOT DISTURB" on facebook and i just heard their door shut and lock...I'm leaving
Have fun at school today. Try to hide that you're a whore. The other girls will like you better that way.
someone needs to get her out of the garbage can shes never gonna forgive us for this
While you were in the ER we decided to tailgate in the parking lot until security told us that's not allowed.
I woke up to him pissing in their fireplace with fairy wings on.
Let's run into the wild and just eat berries and have sex all the time.
like i literally can feel my uterus getting frustrated at me for not being pregnant.
Look at the picture I MADE him take with me...like why??? He's holding my foot?
I woke up with a black eye and a buttplug...not sure I really want to know what happened.
He told me to leave him behind and bury him in his batman pajamas. So two lessons I guess, don't give Tom whiskey and don't touch his daddy issues with a twenty nine and a half foot pole.
I'm talking to a corgi on tinder..wtf has my life come to
idk he wanted to trade sex for a triple order of hashbrowns
AND YOU SAID NO?????????
Is it acceptable to respond to a declaration of love with 'and I love your dick'? Asking for a friend who shares a name and possibly a phone number with me. Entirely coincidental.
Randomize
