Yeah but my nose is so stuffed if I tried to give him head I'd suffocate
I'm already going to be stripping so like pretty much you would just be watching me. Also we're watching twilight. again.
youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
I answered the my mom's phone call about what we're doing for father's day while he was still fucking me. She thought I seemed really excited about his hiking boots present.
I don't think I have ever puked up that much free breakfast in my life...thank god for Nickle Beers.
well at least you didnt have sex with him. i feel like a proud mother. you always have sex with them.
apparently he thought telling me 'the weasel wants to come out to play' would somehow convince me to go down on him
Alright. I will breast feed the first person to get here.
I dnt think she needs convincing on the threesome part, it's the threesome with your roommate situation that needs some work
God fucking bless the man who invented the vibrator. Bless him and all his descendants. I think I saw the face of God tonight
And tan into my neighbor in the elevator. She was going to the gym. I was covered in mascara and dog hair eating a hash brown
I was figuring I'd break up with her after work, but before Taco Tuesday
I don't trust a bar IN TENNESSEE that doesn't have Jack Daniels.
wait you fucked a guy who wears k-swiss? seriously?
I know, im living my 7th grade dream
His dick has the same name as my pipe. I'm keeping him forever.
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