come on don't hate me. your brother looks just like you its almost a complement that i had sex with him.
The movie was so bad she gave me two blowjobs. Two.
yeah, i found the sharpie that everyone use to sign my tits last night. its dead.
I shouldn't trust a guy I just met with the pull out method. That's a big responsibility.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Someone took a picture of their balls on my phone last night. BEAUTIFUL PACKAGE. I will find this man.
i got two bottles of merlot and sorrows to drown, you in??
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
Bro what are you doing Thursday the day before I go to jail??
Of course the first guy who sees my nipple piercings is a Catholic from Nebraska who won't do anything but dry hump me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am watching xfiles and eating microwaved cookiedough, and I see nothing wrong with it.
How likely is it that we can see each other tomorrow night? I want to shave my legs in good faith but it's cold outside and my bathroom is drafty.
I dipped out before he woke up, but I made sure to take the pizza with me.
It was a strange night. I made out with his college roommate and said "do you care?" beforehand.
I'm going to come in the middle of the night and attack you with spoons
admittedly, geting that drunk in front of my last two exes wasnt a good idea
probably didn't help that you cheated on them with each other either
Randomize