god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
Dude i dont know how people can complain that waterboarding is such a bad thing. I just sat through a fucking puddle of mudd show. Now thats torture
Of course, I believed he would find me irrestible...sloppy drunk, chugging from a bottle of chardonnay, and completely naked because those kids stole my clothes as I was swimming on their private beach
I also referred to her clitorous as her "vagina dot" last night...probably going to be dumped soon.
Good thing it was his birthday because I accidentally grabbed his dick at the bar. A lot.
do you think theyll let us bring mariachis to the strip club?
We made the bar tender tell us how he proposed to his girlfriend. In detail. While we made gushing noises. We are embarrassments to females everywhere
I'm not drinking anymore...and by that, I mean until St. Patrick's Day.
My only downfall is that I can only take shots in twos.
I'm not saying you did or didn't sleep with him but he's has your thong hanging from his ceiling fan
Was your wine and cheese snap taken from the toilet?
I just put vodka in my apple sauce. Spice up your fucking life.
But did u die
I found an onion in my purse
Just ate 2 pieces of pizza in the shower.. New low or fuckin brilliant??
We're like a married couple, but we only have sex on college holidays and other people's birthdays.
Randomize
