her vagine was all disorganized.
I swear my cock just shook it's head disapprovingly at me.
Professor used "ROFL" while grading my paper... Do I even go to a real college?
So last week was the 4th time a girl cried after sex. I'm seriously doing something wrong
you fully convinced the taxi driver that we were in a race
ALTON JUST DID GRAVY SHOTS. THIS IS WHY HE'S MY HERO
Being the adderall dealer on campus, I feel responsible for everyone graduating.
I want to apologize but I don't know how. Do I just say "sorry for OD'ing on your couch"? I think that just sounds weird.
Nothing like moscato in your sinuses tobmake your night complete
Sometimes you've gotta crawl to stay concious
Is it too early to get staydrunk at 1pm on Friday for Monday's St Patty's day
So instead of going to meet her mom, I decided to jump out of her window which was about 1.5 stories off the ground. I'm alright, but I ended up meeting her mom anyway.
How high?! We watched paid programming for 45 minutes before we realized it wasn't just a long commercial. So pretty high. The Bionic fish finder looks promising, though.
Lets get a boat first.
sorry i got drunk at sunday brunch and force fed carrot sticks to your cat
Finally fucked my buddy's mom!! We are both ten years older and for her it really shows but i hit it!!
Randomize
