I got everything I ever gave her back, every picture, and money for the dog. I didn't want it she brought it all back and gave it to me. clothes jackets, pictures, dried flowers, ear rings, necklace...
Sell it on ebay and let's go to the bar
no you're not listening to me HE WANTED TO BRAID MY HAIR
Dude she has a fucking rock collection. Never will I ever talk to her again.
i think it would be like really awesome if scientist could genetically engineer manatees to be like the size of goldfish so i could have one in my fishbowl and be like FUCK YEAH TINY MANATEE
what part of what i said meant "bring a bowl"
"bouncy castle"
Come down. You're the next contestant on this bowl.
you puked on the porch, i can see your jacket on the floor next to your underwear. i know your home, unchain the door, you're the worst roommate ever.
I had to talk to the cops at my front door in a bathrobe, with the buttplug still in.
I almost got on a bus to Langley Air Force Base. 99% sure that's not where I wanna be.
He told me how it ended, then I blew him.
So he ruined the best cinematic experience of your life and you REWARDED him??
MEAN GIRLS IS ON NETFLIX! I REPEAT, MEAN GIRLS IS ON NETFLIX! THIS IS NOT A DRILL! I LITERALLY NOW HAVE TO CANCEL ALL OF MY WEEKEND PLANS.
Well. We had sex and then watched 6 episodes of Dateline NBC together; only breaking the silence to make disapproving noises at shotty police work. So basically yea I'm gonna marry him.
He finished and he wasn't even totally hard. He actually came without a boner.
HOW IS THAT EVEN POSSIBLE.
Someone drank my pedialite!
YOU drank your pedialite. I watched you chase shots with it!
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
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