Pretty sure I only gave out my other # though. You know, 777 777-7777
Hahaha. So was it a Freudian slip, or wishful thinking? ;)
Could be either seeing as you're in my phone as "3rd bar" and I couldn't pick you outta a line up.
He ripped my extensions out during sex, not noticing until this morning when he saw them on the floor. I told him they werent mine and he went and threw them in his sister's room.
Girls don't like it when you cum inside them and then discuss baby names.
I hate the hobo that sits outside our building
Joe or Chris?
do i even wanna kno y u kno their names?
well i came home drunk one night and Chris offered me a beer as i was coming in, it was kinda weird but i wasn't goin to deny a free beer. you're proolly talkin about Joe though, he's the one with the fucked up eye.
My uncles bleeding, my brother has a black eye and my moms topless in the pool... How was your family cookout?
there is way too much butter on my body for this to be okay
The girl behind me in psych just tapped me on my shoulder to tell me there was a condom wrapper in my hood.
When I eventually hook up with a resident lets refer to it as taking a hands on approach to my job
No more margaritas for you. Also, tequila should be reclassified as a hallucinogen.
If you don't fuck me hard, rough, and senseless the minute we're alone in your room, I'm returning you to the boyfriend store
We are making a pool on how long he stays sober this time you want in?
I got St Patrick's Day drunk on Friday and apparently ordered a Total Gym in the middle of the night
Anytime he goes down on me i automatically think of you cheering me on. Your a good friend.
Regardless I WANT TO BE YOUR SEX DISPENSARY. that is like the career I was born for.
Didn't think I'd be dancing with the Power Rangers but here I am
Randomize
