Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(210): View more from Texas

i think i would be perfectly content if, on my deathbed, i could look back on a life that didn't have any fisting in it

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(408): View more from California

Everytime she would start slurring, she'd stop, hold up a finger, wait like 30 seconds, then try again. I love drunk people

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(318): View more from Louisiana

This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions

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(360): View more from Washington

afterwards we were spooning and he said he wished he was a kangaroo so he cold put me in his pouch and keep me forever. I left as soon as he was asleep.

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25 People Confess What They’re Shamefully Attracted To
Read it at the TFLN blog
(231): View more from Michigan

I just saw a van full of amish parents and their kids. Those cheating mother fuckers!

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(515): View more from Iowa

I'm pregaming before our pregaming dinner...with peanut butter and beer. I think I need to re-evaluate my budget...

(316): View more from Kansas

Just the budget?

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(403): View more from Alberta, CA

I woke up with her little sister yelling "she's dead !!" from the bathroom doorway.

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(219): View more from Indiana

Fuck edible panties there is a dress made out of bacon

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(413): View more from Massachusetts

alll i remember is comming back downstairs, his pants were off and he was aplauding me

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