which bright sisters idea was it to put semi-formal in the middle of no-shave november?
You threw up in a Dixie cup last night. Oddly, you just gained major points in my book for that.
On the quad today: An amish choir singing something weird, and not 30 feet away 3 girls tanning topless. Definition of diversity.
I gave the naked guy in the hotel hall a pop tart. He stopped crying.
Anyways, i'm off to play with a rubber dick and a ouija board with two other girls...
today's the one month anniversary of me not giving anyone head. can you tell me you're proud
it's sad that this is a milestone
Tell him I thought his Superman stand on your bed and cum all over your back was quite funny
Man...I want to get monumentally fucked tonight.
So I just stole my deans keys to break into the dining hall to get coco puffs. I shouldn't have gone to this meeting stoned.
"Yeah because the first thing I think of when I hear the word college is tear gas."
Sigh. I'll find the right guy one day.
Prince charming is right around the corner and will be freaky as shit!
Trying not to ruin Mother's Day with the enormous hickey on my neck. Nice.
You need to finger her with the Spock hand sign since she loves Star Trek.
She drank my rum. I had sex in her bed and didn't wash the sheets. We're even.
New life goal: Sex in a parking lot surrounded by a circle of fire.
Randomize
