i don't care what she did to you. we are not having sex in front of your sister.
he used a semicolon in his bootycall text, of course he's not gonna go down on me.
There's nothing more uncomfortable than drifting into sexual fantasies on a roadtrip and realizing you have a boner with three other dudes in the car.
so my doctor just swabbed my throat, and he looked up in suprise when i had no gag reflex. yea, he just judged me.
I want Paula Dean to narrate shark week next year
I actually don't know if I can stand up. I just know better than to try
Come down here. We are watching people walk through the paper we taped in front of the elevator.
I will not hesitate to go down on a dick for some cream soda.
Yeah then you killed that bottle of Bacardi in under 20 minutes. So much for being an organ donor.
Honestly I don't even have room for feelings after that Taco Bell
Beer and Reeses. dinner of champions
I vaguely remember ordering a water at some point last night. It's good to know drunk me can still be responsible.
If you get banged by this bartender you know you can't be mad at me right? Its the rules.
How does the curb feel today?
It's stronger than my elbow. But I found my lighter while I was down there.
Anyhow. He gives me orgasms and cuddles and buys me dinner and alcohol. Ill keep him around and cross that other girl bridge when we get there ha ha
Randomize
