We found an eightball on the ground last night. I mean, really, who does that?
i kinda do this "flirt with girls and pretend to be a hot white guy named chris" thing
so my mom just told me that she wouldnt pick me up and take us to taco bell at 3AM...
I heard you threw up in your lap?
I heard that too.
he knocked over the vodka and juice...picks up the cup and says "yes", takes the last sip...doesnt even worry about the mess all over the floor and we continue having sex.
You guys need to get along, there is no need for a pissing contest...We're all fucking each others ex's.
got delayed, meet you at the bar soon, found a shopping cart, i am now getting pushed to the bar by some guy that was peeing in the alley i found the cart in
Just did a drug deal on the toy aisle at walmart, Merry Christmas
Ugh why does it have to be margarita Monday. Why can't it be pants off dance off beer pong but with jager Monday.
Atlanta road trip update. Jimmy fell into the petting tank at the aquarium. And freaked out. With cops now... Keep you posted
My apartment smells like a lavender field inside of a giant bong.
im in the post action - pre consequence stage.
Haha ohman remember when I peed in your blender? Gotta love college.
YOU DID WHAT???
Dude of course I want to. Your penis is beautiful.
Honestly, I want an afternoon of mild abuse, mixed with face fucking and general molestation that turns in love making, laughter and cinnamon toast crunch naked in bed.
Randomize
