I feel like this whole "telling that guy i have a kid to avoid him" thing is getting out of hand..
How so?
Probably at the point when i told him i was "Too drunk to drive" and "had to pick up my kid" all in a span of like 2 hours.
I would have thought, as two of my best friends, you girls could have cought me as I fell out of the shower. There are so many bruises.
I need a picture of your dick for my friends birthday card
yo your bro wants to know what time he got home and were you hosing him off
Also, not pregnant! Way to go uterus! Good job on being a team player!
You picked up her frozen vom puddle and threw it like a frisbee.
I HAVE A GENTLEMANLY VAGINA.
So I almost just died there. And we need a new garage door.
Sending dick pics while driving a car going 80 in the rain at night to a married woman? Why hello 2014
Would it be crossing a line if I told him that I now know his girlfriend has a huge mole on her left ass cheek?
Idk how I even got accepted into college because literally the only things my brain ever thinks about are YouTube videos of baby animals and sex.
Sorry again for almost setting you on fire.
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
We gotta locate my vibrators and get them stashed away STAT
He bent me in ways I couldn't imagine.. and im a gymnast.
Randomize
