I dont abuse you, i just hit you while we have sex
just found out my horoscope sign is scales. it's like i was destined to be a drug dealer
I mean we havent seen each other since december and then bam its cinco de mayo and were having sex under a life guard tower taking tequila shots between each position. no big deal
i just got cockblocked by a guy drinking wine straight out of the bottle with a straw...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
can you come back were all locked out and alyssia's still inside passed out on the floor but more importantly i left a beer in there that's not finished
They have a booking log online so i can just check that instead of call
Technology: making bailing your sister out easier since 2008
I just sneezed weed. Kinda wanna try to smoke it.
How did I roll 7 times this month and survive?\nI must be some sort of ecstasy goddess
apparently, dueling with garden tools in Home Depot is strictly frowned upon
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Called my house today and my 10 year old brother answered and asked if I was still in jail
I was so high I watched a 5 minute video of different scenes of horses running. The music was magical.
She took her panties off, then farted in my general direction. I guess we're at that stage in our relationship.
Video footage says last night I reincarnated as stripper Shania Twain... Man, I feel like a (slutty) woman.
There is a pool of ranch salad dressing in my purse...I know thats always been something you've wanted to try..so don't even act like you didn't do this.
Tonight I totally got eaten out in the old school photo booth in the mall. Will send you pics of the photo reel asap
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