she said she was living bicuriously through me.
The only thing worse than being arrested is the fact the cop confiscated my green dinosaur costume.
You're really doing everyone a disservice by wearing pants all the time.
Omfg amy I'm not kidding you I think a blow job is what landed me in the hospital
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We fed him just...so many bright colored crayons when he was blacked out. I hope he looks at his shits because this could be all for nothing
You are COMPLAINING that the sex was too good. You're not getting any sympathy from me
I was mid hand job and stopped me because he wanted to "connect" which meant putting his thumb in between my eyebrows and a hand over my heart and closing our eyes...
The last thing I remember is singing hotel California with a hobo and asking every bald man I saw if I could touch his head.
It's entirely possible that I'm fucking yet another gay guy
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Aint no party like a Broke College Girls Eating Stuffed Crust Pizza party
I just paid $10 for tinder plus so that I could change my location to Rio and match with Olympic Athletes
Tinder recommend to a friend: making threesomes easier since 2016
My hookup from last weekend apparently got arrested today... his roommate just tagged me on facebook asking for bail money.
I'm going to target high, just in case I ask you where my paycheck went later
I just realized that this is the first time I've ever seen your mom without sucking your cock.
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