Still drunk and leading the team through the 9am sales meeting. I'm pretty sure this is why there aren't more 26year-olds in management.
I have a new drinking limit. I'll stop when I know I'm going to untag the picture that was just taken of me.
oh fat girl friday strikes again...
he peed everywhere. it's like having a puppy.
I'm drinking margaritas out of a soup mug, of course I'm going to get wasted
They're all gay and their wifi network is named HOMOS. I want to live with these people.
I think it might be brain cancer. Hangovers can't be this bad
Bitches at mcdonalds acting like they never seen a girl puke in her own coat pocket before
i've eaten like 19 popsicles... what the fuck have you done today?
It's was about average. But he had a tat on his thigh that said "pull-out n' rollout" so I won't have to worry about a round two request.
I said "I am wrapped in the Cocoon Of Comfort! You should go." He started to argue and I yelled "COCOON OF COMFORT!!!" silencing him
sober me is the one who makes bad decisions every boyfriend I've ever had I met sober
This bitch goes out driving during the nor'easter to get her ass eaten.. that’s dedication
Just peed on the front lawn of the capital building. Great American.
i hooked up with all four beatles on halloween get on my level
Randomize
