I had a dream you and I were having sex. It was pretty romantic.... until you started pulling out toys.
He wants to be 'in an open relationship'. Fuck that. That's the online equivalent of letting him pee in a circle around me.
God, you're like boner-b-gone
I'm still trying to decide if it's a complement when he said "I'd like to subscribe to your daddy issues".
We lived together for a year and neither of us knew we were both gay.
He literally said to me "go ahead and answer that text message while I eat you out"... Maybe I AM the relationship type...
I'm wearing fairy wings and I broke my wizard staff. If this isn't the most happy but sad moment of my life , I don't know what is.
So I spent all night thinking my bed was floating down a river and telling the cats to get on the bed because they were going to float away. Percocet is strong shit.
The only downside to doctor sex is that getting choked with a stethoscope leaves marks.
Damn it. Can't order pizza. Can't do the hot tub. No one to invite over for loud, kinky sex. What's the point of being here alone?!
When Ben was deep throating pickles last night I actually reconsidered our relationship
I don't care what you say about him, his cock is the stuff dreams are made of.
I may not have my dignity, pride or sanity but I have my pants.
Had a one night stand and didnt remember the guys name until he started sending me poems in the mail.
It's a classy one I promise! Their toilets are cushioned an tier wifi is named hummingbird
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