Changed my sheets. Found a can of rockstar, crushed bag of tostitos, used tissues, and enough of both of our clothes to make a whole outfit.
I just looked at the maps icon on my IPhone and "eR" was typed in the search address bar. I wonder if we ever got there.
Osama's death just kick started our Cinco de mayo celebration. Margaritas for anyone wearing red white and blue!
hand shaped bruises on both boobs again....i wish i could say this is the first time.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He told me to put on my big boy pants, then take them off and fuck her before he smacks me with a chair. His pep talks suck.
I feel like i just got chewed up and shit out by a ukranian midget
She seems less like a roommate, and more like a homeless person who snuck into your apartment.
I fell off my bed and busted open my chin on the prisoner of azkaban. Somehow missed the almost empty Jose handle next to it. So guess what I was doing last night?
Idk but she keeps giving me s'mores and I'm having a hard time caring about her alcoholism because of it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He called from a stranger phone to say. He was a t a liquior store and there was a long line they have no condoms. This is the guy i was gonna go on a date with
Atleast he is letting you know he will be late
i woke up with fake boobs glued on my chest and a large black dildo on my hand. then i had to dress myself and walk home. people saw.
You're wearing pigtails and giving away our kitchen appliances. Clearly, you're drunk.
We were 6 minutes into the movie before we realized the whole movie was spoken in Italian. That level of stupidly-ripped
I think one make out session at a bar per year is probably the best choice.
I used to shoot steroids in my ass but for a totally different reason
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