Wanted to apologize for chris browning you when you were on my computer.
we saw you sitting at the door of the dorm trashed, wrapped in DANGER tape with a stolen balloon around your wrist
I never thought I'd hear the words "aww you pulled out" and "you're so sweet" in the same sentence.
the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
i'm pretty sure they aren't charging me for that window i broke with a turkey sandwich while i was hammered.
you woulda been proud of me tonight though. i only made out with 2 guys. and in my defense one of them was to get a job after graduation.
i just saw the eighteen different ways i could die and only after that did i realize i'd made a poor decision
I've reached the slutty point of no return. And it feels like multiple orgasms and coke lines
Thanksgiving. This year's theme: I am thankful that I still have a liver.
True life. I have to get a nose job due to a deviated septum from blowing coke. Thank you college.
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
The salesman at the smoke shop just told me my hair is glorious...
Dad got stoned the other day and bought us potty training seats for when we have children
you were on a whole other level. you went home with him because he said "you got some light ass eyes"
I'm just really glad SD weather is so erratic so I can get away with wearing a scarf in May to cover up these hickeys.
Randomize
